Weakness fostering and treatment against it

 

«If she turns me down or doesn’t go to the movies with me I will not take it», - so what? Will your head fall off? Or will your heart jump off your chest and fly away high into the air as a wounded bird?!?

Oh yeah, right away.

Sure, 4 billion people endured it and you’re the only one who will not!

Ok, not the only one – there are a few hundred fools who found themselves in the same situation and took their lives. But they did it not because they were swayed by particularly elevated sentiments – but because their brains were defective.

There are many examples of such idiocy. Nevertheless youth and not very young people keep on suffering with this rubbish, and some of them do it often and in plenty. The others do it occasionally; but we know that the behavior pattern used on regular basis becomes a habit and later the destiny.

What is it all about?

People seem to be different and the reasons for their weakness fostering should be different too, but is it really so?

My personal and deeply anti-humane opinion is that medicine is to blame.

Some 500 years ago that was simply impossible: such weak people didn’t live till the age of 1 and natural selection ensured our biological spices against these behavioral habits. But hygiene, antibiotics and mass immunization did their job and survival potential of children increased rapidly, including those children who...mmm... let’sleave sad things behind.

So nature chose another way:

People who shouldn’t have lived in the literal sense of the word cease living socially, i.e. dissociate themselves from the social and personal life fostering their weaknesses.  Yes, they surely spoil the lives of their close people by their whining, passiveness and misery, but on the other hand they work and sometimes help the others and...generally minuses of their lives are compensated with some pluses. Besides, really good people can be found among them. 

No, I’m not bad and cruel, I do understand that they are human beings and have rights not only consume public oxygen but live well too.

And this means that any person has the right to cut that nonsense – leave the crowd of losers – develop himself – and live a good full-fledge human life with joy and sorrow, achievements and losses – and this time not like a “miserable creature” but as an adequate human.

In other words: I clearly distinguish person’s “i” (“Vyakta” in Sanskrit) from his “I” (“Jiva” in Sanskrit). Weakness fostering is the problem of “i” = the problem of Ego. At the same time, the human himself – his “I” – is a victim in fact. His mistake is that he indulges his Ego.

And now the virus of self-destruction – i.e. weakness fostering - is seething Ego.

From my point of view it means that when a person fusses over his weaknesses like a hen with one chicken, it’s not his fault – it’s his disease. It should be treated in a friendly way (if the person wants to).

And this leads to an absolutely natural question «how?».

Here’s something interesting: I have never seen such particularly vulnerable people in the rural area. Maybe I didn’t communicate enough with people there or maybe one of the treatment methods is hidden there: that is daily manual labor.

It’s really interesting for me to take a look at a teenager who would be afraid of his classmates laughing at his clothes, let’s say, after he dug up a garden of 2 hundred square meters with his own hands. No, I admit it possible in principle – but I’d love to see this wonder))))

In the countryside children and adults are forced to work physically. They are forced to walk a lot, carry heavy things (e.g. fodder for their farm animals) and so on and on.

Probably, the muscles engaged secrete a specific hormone which is a good medicine for weakness fostering.

Option №1:

For urban people, this problem can be solved by means of weightlifting exercises and sports – they also provide good muscles load.

Well, or they are brought up by belt and fist (that is absolutely not educational or humane).

Imaginary sufferings – and weakness fostering is certainly аsuffering – entirely lose to real sufferings, including ordinary physical pain.

However, I’m not going to seek here for a way how to apply it for treatment.

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Butlet’sleaveruralareaalone. Yes, sports and working on your physical body  is good and useful, I believe there’s no point in proving this axiom one more time. The problem is that demonstratively weak people are too weak to even try to load themselves tangibly. So this method is only good for preventive measures. Thus, we should find something cardinally different...

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There was psychologist Eric Burne.

He was a smart man, and among other things he mentioned such term as “brown coupons” in his books.

Whatismeanthere?

At early age a child grows, learns and also learns emotions as reactions to the visual environment. During this learning process the child chooses most pleasant emotions – though these emotions are not always constructive. Pleasure (as an emotion), joy, laugh, peace and other constructive emotions are so-called “golden coupons” and if the child chooses them as favorite ones an emotionally healthy person who seeks to increase his emotional wealth grows up.

The other children choose such reactions as offence, anger, accusation, hatred, etc. as favorite ones – these are “brown coupons”. Such people always try to find someone to blame, to be hurt by, etc. (of course, every person has his own set of favorite “coupons”).

(I insistently recommend to find E. Burne’s books and read them).

IMHO, it’s obviously that the person who fosters his weaknesses is a “brown coupons” lover; particularly he likes to feel vulnerable, weak (probably worthless).  Maybe in his early childhood his mother paid attention to him when he was sick, or maybe not, it’s hard to determine sight unseen but there’s something like that for sure.

Is it possible to overcome unhealthy thirst for “brown coupons”? Yes, it is.

Yet this process is long and not easy, and for weak people it’s hard.

However, anything is hard for a weak person, so... so like it or not but a weakling has one global choice: stay worthless (in terms of emotions) or change his life. If he chooses to change his life – it means he’ll have to work hard anyway; specifically don’t let his destructive habits rule over his behavior.

In some cases there’ll be a burdening factor consisting in that change need obviousness comes to the person when his close people no longer believe in his strength at all and his ability to change cardinally anything particularly in his life; so the man actually stays one-on-one with his character. Or he may go and pay to a psychologist.

That’s if you follow pure psychological way.

But we don’t restrict ourselves to psychology ))))

So let’s approach it from the point of view of esoterism and bioenergetics in particular.

Let’s take such person and see... a person as a person. If he’s alive it means that his energy centers are working. But he directs his energy to his “I can’t take it”. It seems that it takes only to stop such nonproductive usage of own energy... but it’s already a habit – energy system already adapted for such energy processes – the channels established, programs work (and will is weakened on the contrary).

Is there a way to stop it all at once?

Let me mention: in this very case such a generally universal step as “fall in love” most likely will not work.

Well, there are chances that infatuation will knock out energy to a different  routine, but yet there are chances that Ego will cope with a flooding disaster and take the person to sufferings like “I don’t deserve her” or something like that.

Let’s go back to the very beginning and give a more precise diagnosis of this contagion display.

The person is aware of his weakness and spends on it inadequate much time, at the same time working up himself by fantasies regarding possible troubles caused by this weakness. It means that in fact he is scared of something but instead of overcoming his fear he expends his energies on something that kind of “floats” in this fear.  He experiences his fear over and over again in his imaginary conditions. And of course, he’s not able to manage his fear. It is in one sense one of the forms of intellectual masochism.

However, the person may not dream up what troubles are waiting for him: the fear itself may be enough for him. Let’s take a classical case of girls’ absurd fear “I’m sent into panic by mice”: any ...mmm... reasonable grown man understands that a mouse weighing 5 g is not physically able to cause any tangible harm to the man. It’s not enough that the mouse doesn’t have quite strong teeth to bite the man perceptibly (at most it can bite through the skin but some iodine or brilliant green completely solve the problem), the mouse is also a very timid animal and will not attack the man – a mouse is very scared of man and there are good reasons for it! )))

Actually, when the man catches a mouse it falls into paralysis from seizing fear, and most brave mice try to slip out and run away... that’s it!

During my multiple contacts with mice this animal didn’t show anything similar to aggression.

But girls are scared of mice… Sure, there are girls who just show off but there are sincerely hysterical girls. “OhmyGod! It can run through my foot and I can’t take it!” Mice ran through my foot many times and absolutely nothing bad happened to my skin)))).

But it’s not about mice – it’s about “I can’t take it”…

My article seem to be exaggerated, so I suppose I’ll stop beating about the bush and proceed to methods of leaving this vicious circle “I’m scared – I pay attention to fear – I lose my strength – I have no strength to fight my fear – I’m scared - …”

In my opinion, the leaving point in this loop is “I lose my strength”. Having changed this statement in particular it is possible to break the chain and overcome the fear. If you get over the fear, it will be impossible to waste your attention on it.

I believe experienced esoteric people don’t have such a problem so I’ll try to choose the simplest methods that can be applied by any untrained person.

Now, the task is to gain energy in time and sufficient capacity to overcome a certain (panic) fear.

Step No. 1 is very simple: eat substantially, at that eat adequate. 

Since the aim is to gain energy, a salad and juice will not do – the person needs high-caloric products, meat is advisable, pepper and spices are advisable.

If there is a possibility – take a bath and/or sun-bath (i.e. warm yourself on the sun) before eating.

The best thing is to eat well about one hour before prospective meeting with the fear.

As a rule, these actions raise the general energy level well.

Step No. 2 is force your attention to something pleasant. Even “positiff” that I dislike so much will be of use here:

Look through the pictures of cute puppies, or remember especially pleasant moment of your summer vacations – everyone chooses his own distraction.

It’s important to switch your attention to something that will not take away your energy, but, please, no fanaticism. Escape into positive fantasies will not solve the problem, i.e. you only need a little support for yourself.

It’s better to do it about 15 minutes before facing your fear.

Step No. 3.  The following thing may be quite helpful…

A little amount of alcohol. Literally 20 grams of vodka, so… that only chicks got redden. More alcohol – no, attentiveness and self-control reduces – your psyche may respond by the most unpredictable way, on the whole solving problems by alcohol is evil. BUT! While great amounts of alcohol deprive a person of his energy in a moment, little amounts of it on the contrary increase energy for a short time but notably. If using this effect once – it will help. At that, vodka is the best, not any other alcohol.

It’s better to drink it about 5 min before the situation. 

Step No. 4: identify yourself with a role that can easily cope with the situation. (In other words, try to activate appropriate sub-personality… but you may not overload yourself with witty terms :) )

Whatismeanthere? We are different at different times, and, certainly, there were moments in our lives when we acted like strong and brave people (even though in other situations). As a last resort, remember somebody else or a literary character and act as if you are that very character – applying not your but his reactions to the situation.

Well, your identification with the other person is not good in general. So, don’tdothatveryoften. But it will do for overcoming a certain fear quire well: if you didn’t overcome the fear, it will not get worse, but if you manage to overcome it – actually, the man himself did that, and as for the role he played… it won’t be considered as substitution of the man’s role – it will be a replacement of one role (destructive) by the other one (constructive). After all, we all play some roles in our lives. “I can’t take it” is also one of Ego’s masks and, thus, losing it will not harm our “I”, as well as replacing it by a brave one will not make the situation worse.

The only thing is that this method may not work at once – if the man gets ready for a terrible event, he should train, get the feel of the chosen role in advance.

It’s necessary to get the feel of it about 5 min before “X hour”.

Step No. 5 – gather all your strength and go into action :)

That is….

- try to catch that scary mouse with your hands. You will hardly succeed (this animal is clever and fast), but at least try.

- take a snail or spider in your hands (they are slower so you certainly succeed).

- open the door and enter the room where there is a group of new people.

- mount the platform and read your report (sing a song, dance, etc)

- come up to her cheerfully and invite to the movies without roundabouts and preambles.

- …

Well, whatever ails you :)

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And after the struggle… after the struggle with your fear – of course, if you succeeded – there’ll be the following:

First, burstofadrenalin. If the fear was gotten over indeed, this very overcoming releases your energy which is usually displayed as adrenalin coming.

Second, after your body calms down, it will turn out that the fear was far from being as strong as it seemed. That’s….

That’ssubjectively. Thefearstayedthesame – conditionschanged, i.e. youhadhighenergylevel, sothefearofthesamestrengthwillbesubjectivelyweaker – yetitsstrengthdidn’tchange. If you gain even more energy (for example, do physical training or fill up yourself with appropriate element energy additionally to my pieces of advice), it may appear that the fear was not strong… but it’s not exactly like that.

Third, after your energy level turns to normal again, there may be “reverse motion” – you may feel burst of fear that you did something very awful (for example, held a spider in your hands). It happens not always but sometimes. Well… youjusthavetogothroughit. In this course remind yourself that you already did that and nothing really bad happened to you – you ALREADY went through this situation and it means that next time it will be much easier.

Four – you need this next time. Actually, it’snecessary.

Of course, overcoming your fear for the second time is much easier than for the first time, but it’s necessary, besides it’s very and very advisable that this happens as soon as possible.

Very roughly: in a month or two the first overcoming of fear will simply be lost, whether the man did something or not will not mater any more.

That’s because fear overcoming takes several minutes, but the man was scared of it for several years (or even decades). Besides, there is still persistence of thinking. And it means that the fear that was successfully gotten over may return.

Thus, it’s necessary to go through the same situation again. It’s better to do that the next day or at least withing 2-3 days. This time it should be without such energy filling up and without alcohol for sure (that’s important). Yet you can eat well (though less than for the first time), support yourself a little with pleasant memories, warm on the sun (if it shines) and remember the role of a victor (but this time it’s better not to identify yourself so much – just recall the image).

Now again, gather all your strength and go into action! :)

Overcoming fear for the second time – yes, that’s the result. By the way, it’s a good reason for self-respect.

You can do something similar with your other “I can’t take it” (well, of course, except for the reasonable ones like “220V current rush”).

Conclusion: if the man really wants it – he is able to overcome his “hypersensitivity” and “fantastic vulnerability” – everything depends on him.